The Young and Disenchanted

I’m yours – The College Insomniac

Posted on: 11 February, 2009

Sleep is for chumps 

So I m up at 6am in the morning on a Saturday morning, wondering why in hells name am I hearing moaning from the next door. Maybe not why am I hearing this but more like how. I got my music on, listening to some Jason Mraz “I m yours.” Yet the groaning and moaning coming from the next door pierces through the sound coming from my $50 speakers. That’s what you get for not getting BOSE speakers. Now I shall move to talking about pipes (code word for sex). I am proud of the plumber next door; I figure he is fixing the sink pretty well. Using his wrench, he seems to be twisting it harder and harder. Yet the sink seems to be gushing and making a weeping sound. The analogy of sex to plumbing always cracks me up. You are talking to one Negro that can never hate on the player so I shall stop talking about some other Negro getting some and focus on why the hell I am up this late.

Before I came to college, I slept pretty regular hours. Maybe I lie a bit but I can hardly remember ever seeing the sunrise. The latest hours I can remember were like maybe 2am or even 3am. Those ‘late’ hours mostly involved watching late night TV because during the regular hours TV was on news courtesy of my father or TBN (gospel channel) courtesy of my mother, both of which in my younger days I didn’t care for. Actually I still don’t care much for watching the news, I rather read it online or hear a dude with a British accent deliver the news on BBC because my ass is so colonized. My late hours in my teens include my first experience of pornographic material. In my case, it must have been when I was 13 or 14 years old. I actually stumbled upon it. If you have lived in English-speaking Africa in the last decade you have heard of DSTV. Our South African Satellite Company that provides western TV to Africa for some cheddar in expenditure. Anyway their movie channel progressively got more adult on Saturday nights eventually culminating in soft-core porn. The thing is I almost got caught several times by my light-sleeping father but alas I was too legit to quit. Got my hand on the ‘alt’ button and switched it to CNN with the quickness and acted like I was sleeping, simply genius. Of course, kids or people of hyper conservative leaning, I am not advocating porn I actually have a point. The reason I remember this is that that watching soft core porn on a weekend at 13 included me hearing some moaning and now 8 years later sitting in my room typing this also has me hearing moans except I am not seeing any ‘titties’ now. It amazes me how things remain parallel after so many years.

I can’t blame my insomnia completely on college. I could see the signs at an early age. I don’t want anyone to misconstrue my sleeplessness for hard work or dedication. Hell to the No. Some of the best sleep I have is the day before an exam. In the beginning AKA freshman year, I was introduced to red bull. I walked into a seven eleven and asked my Indian brother behind the counter for something to keep me awake. I felt like I was going to fall apart. Homeboy pointed me to a gray can with some blue on it and I had of course seen the commercials that said it gave wings. The red bull called to me and was much more enticing than a naked Angelina Jolie beckoning to me. All it took was a sip and I felt like a super human. My life was never going to be the same. I felt like an evangelical that had just accepted Mr Jesus (Hey-sus) into my life. Eventually, I acquired the ability to stay awake without the caffeine or red bull. Now as I speak to you, I have the ability to stay awake till 6am without the use of any substances. I have become quite the nocturnal creature. I always joke with people when they ask why they haven’t seen me around that I am like Batman, I only come out at night and in the day time I am so fast like Bruce Wayne in his Lamborghini.

Why do I enjoy this? I think a part of me has always been in love with solitude. Growing up as an only child I had more time to my thoughts than other people. Late at night when other humans are sleeping is the time I like to sit down and plot how I can take over the world, just kidding. I gather my thoughts together and potential things to think about include ex girlfriends who seem to be planning evil against lil ol me, my general lack of trust of people and accompanying paranoia, my money making schemes, ‘love’ (think it’s a bunch of hooey) interests and all things young and disenchanted people think about. Another reason is that sometimes staying awake is the only way to run away from my dreams and nightmares. Dreams scare me as well. Sometimes dreams reveal things that you aren’t ready to deal with. Some of these Things are seemingly good such as new relationships and potential ones that are exciting your subconscious. I detest dreaming about women/girls in a romantic way. It confuses my life. Some might call this me trying to run away from my emotions. When you dream about kissing a girl you thought you weren’t romantically interested in, it creates problems when you see her the next day. Sometimes the fear of rejection could make a dream turn into a nightmare. No one likes nightmares; yes I do state the obvious. Like having a dream I met the devil and his name was Christoff and he was blonde with a black trench coat and smoking a cigarette. Don’t ask me about these things ask my subconscious.

lovely song by Jason Mraz, I m yours. Soothes my soul.


Why do you stay awake? I’d love to hear from you.


2 Responses to "I’m yours – The College Insomniac"

I usually stay awake when I just have too many things on my mind and im so busy analysing some situation I’m in and sometimes its cuz im writting a song in my head…but most of the time im in lala land as soon as my head touches the sack

btw thats a really nice song…soothing is the word
n nice blog

Yeah I stay awake because man in this recession, the future seems uncertain and a brother has so many things to think about. I do agree tho, the song is so soothing. I feel inspired to save the planet or something

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